🐱 “The Cat That Got Me Fired (from My Own Zoom Class)”

 

🐱 “The Cat That Got Me Fired (from My Own Zoom Class)”

Professor Daniel Whitmore was what you'd call… old-school.

He taught Philosophy 101 like it was a Shakespearean monologue.
Always wore tweed. Always said “ergo.”
Thought "TikTok" was the sound his antique clock made.

Then came the pandemic.
And with it — Zoom University.


💻 The Setup

Professor Whitmore had finally mastered the art of screen sharing, and proudly told his class:

“We shall now explore Descartes’ Meditations… in glorious 720p.”

But Professor Whitmore forgot one thing that day:

Mr. Fluffington.

His 17-pound orange tabby cat.
The real king of the house.


😼 The Invasion

The class had just started.
Students were muted, cameras off. The professor was mid-sentence:

“Cogito, ergo su—”

CRASH.

Mr. Fluffington jumped straight onto the laptop.

Suddenly the screen tilted, the camera spun wildly, and all the students could see was:

🟨 A furry orange belly.
🐾 A close-up of whiskers.
🎤 And the cat purring into the mic like a chainsaw in a pillow factory.


🔇 The Fallout

“Excuse me!” Professor Whitmore yelled, trying to lift the cat.

Instead, Mr. Fluffington hit the keyboard.
And with one majestic paw, he managed to:

  1. Unmute all students

  2. Turn on everyone's cameras

  3. And somehow… kick the professor out of his own Zoom room

Like, he was gone.
The host. The lecturer. The authority.
Ejected by a cat.


😱 The Aftermath

For five full minutes, 30 college freshmen stared at one another — and at a frozen image of Mr. Fluffington’s butt.
Nobody knew what to do.
One student whispered, “Is this still part of the lecture?”

Eventually, the TA had to host the rest of the class.
The cat remained. On the desk.
Staring into the void.
Philosophically, even.

“He looks like he is Descartes,” someone said.


📜 Epilogue

The incident became known on campus as:

“The Fluffington Uprising.”

Professor Whitmore returned the next week with a sign taped to his laptop:

“NO CATS ALLOWED (especially philosophers).”


🐾 Moral of the Story?

“I think, therefore I Zoom.”
But my cat?
He deletes.


😹 Hashtags

  1. #ZoomFail

  2. #CatBomb

  3. #FluffingtonGate

  4. #PhilosophyCat

  5. #ProfessorKickedOut

  6. #WorkFromHomeProblems

  7. #CatHijack

  8. #Descatres

  9. #OnlineClassChaos

  10. #TailsOfZoom

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